Many experiences in life have proven to me that power lies in the sentence “Ask and you shall receive”. Have you ever felt frustrated because you got lost driving? You have an appointment in 5minutes. How do you end up where you want to be? Chances are good that the sooner you asked someone the sooner you got to your appointment.
If you don’t ask, people don’t know what you are looking for and therefore in most case you won’t get what you want. Its common sense.
Asking is a powerful and proven way to increase your control in any situation. By asking you increase your knowledge and by using this knowledge, you gain control over the situation and increase the likelihood of getting what you want, according to a Danish proverb “He who is afraid of asking is afraid of learning” Thomas Berger also concurred, he said; “the art and science of asking questions is the source of all knowledge”. Whether it be directions or what path to take in life.
There is even a greater power in asking God, according to James 4:23, “You do not have because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures”.
When motives are right, there is great power in asking God. It is normal and right for children to ask things of their natural and their heavenly father.
It’s been found that 98.75% of all people want to help you. That means 98 times out of 100 ( or 9875 times out of 10000) people will respond to you in a way that is helpful, that’s a better odds than winning the lottery or finding a $20 bill in your couch. So what are you waiting for? The odds are in your favour, humans want to help and the most high God is always there to help too.
WHY PEOPLE DON’T ASK.
1. Its Rude to ask: Some people are told by society, by parents or anyone that it is rude to ask for what you want. The reason from this stems from fear or is passed from the generation before as blindly as it was passed to you. Regardless of where it came from, this school of thought is false. It’s perfectly acceptable to ask for what you want and until you believe this, asking will be very difficult.
2. Fear of Rejection: People fear rejections. They are worried that what they ask for will be turned down. No one likes rejection. Rejection is embarrassing and it hurts our ego, hence it is painful, so we try to get as far away from rejection as possible by choosing the safe route and walking the other way. We tend to justify walking away from a rejection by telling ourselves that if someone wanted us to have something they would offer it to us .We should not be scared to ask for whatever we need, phone number, directions to our appointment and a raise, your boss did not wake up this morning thinking about your next raise. What’s important to you will not be important to them until you bring it to their attention. The worst they can say is no, and be rest assured the big NO will not kill you. If you ask and someone says no, you will be exactly where you started-You have nothing to lose, so ask! W. Clement Stone (1902-2002) A prominent businessman and a philanthropist affirms this by saying; “if there is something to gain and nothing to loose by asking by all means ask”
3. Lack of confidence: When asking, most people stumble over their words and end up muttering something much less than they really wanted, if they ask at all. This is due to a lack of confidence. A confident request has a much greater chance of receiving a positive response. If you do not prepare to ask with confidence, you are sabotaging your chances of getting what you want even before you ask.
BUT HOW DO YOU ASK?
To ask effectively you must;
1. Know what you want – You can only ask what you want only when you know what you want.
2. Ask for what you want, not what you don’t want- Most people ask for what they don’t want. If you are asking your spouse to stop yelling at you, your focus (and theirs) is still on yelling. Asking to be spoken to in a more respectful, caring manner is asking for what you want.
3. Ask specifically: Don’t say give me a lower price , Say I’ll offer you $100 instead
4. Ask the right people – Find someone who is doing or has done what you want to do, then ask them the right questions.
5. Be Daring-Ask something much better than what you want and you will get what you want. According to Jim Rohn “asking is the beginning of receiving. Make sure you don’t go to the ocean with a teaspoon. At least take a bucket so the kids wont laugh at you”
By simply applying the steps outlined above you will see that your life will become richer and more exciting.
Asking can make you feel awkward and uncomfortable. This is natural. Give yourself permission to feel awkward so the discomfort won’t hold you back. But if you don’t ask, you will definitely get a “no” for it anyways.
Remember you will only get what you ask for, so ask for what you want.